Wow. I read today's passage from John 6:56-69 and it just brought everything together for me. This week has been one of contemplating where to turn to in times of trouble. I found myself at a crossroads and having to make a choice on which way to go and wondering if I am ready to go there. I found inner strength in the knowledge that God gives to me gifts to use in order that I may make the right choice and understand I am never without love.
The struggle for me this week has been with trying to get the message across to others that we need to be ready for whatever is coming. Today's passage gave to me the inner peace I've been seeking for the past two weeks. Not necessarily the answer, but a realization, and a reminder, that it's not about me.
With the simplest of responses by 12 men who decided to stay with Jesus while all others left him I found a calmness for my heart and soul. Jesus once again speaks about eating his flesh and drinking his blood as the only way to eternal life. As I mentioned in a post last week John is using that image as a metaphor for fully ingesting what it is he's trying to teach. It would seem, though, that his disciples have had enough of this kind of talk and leave - except for the twelve. To be honest I was beginning to feel the same way.
The twelve are then asked if they wish to leave as well, to which their response is "why, where else can we go." Actually, their words are, "To whom can we go." With this simple response of five words I am reminded that God is in control. I had forgotten that, and so I was living each day for the past two weeks with my soul and heart in turmoil over what I feel is coming and my need to prepare others for that change. I had forgotten to trust that God has already done that.
My refuge is in God, I choose God, Jesus helps dress me with the shoes I need to follow the Holy Spirit's guidance. I trust completely in that knowledge and with that trust I begin to feel my soul calm and my heart mend.
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