Break The Silence

Psalm 32

A few years ago I spoke with a young man who was going through a very difficult time in his life. For at least a year he seemed to be distancing himself from those around him. Things which seemed inconsequential to others quickly angered him as well. More often, as compared to a year or so before then, he could be heard making comments like, "I don't know how people can be so stupid," or "People really only care about themselves, so why bother." These words would have never came from him, let alone be a thought he would have.

His friends and I tried to talk to him, tried to get him to tell us what was going on, why he was thinking and acting the way he was. He would tell us he's alright, and shut down. We all knew something wasn't right, but we couldn't get him to open up.

One day, as he and I were talking about his job, lack of relationship, and other things 20-somethings think about, he said to me in a quiet, distant voice, "Why do people have to die?"

I thought for a while, noting to myself that nobody from his family had passed away in the past few years, nor did anyone close to, or related to someone close to him. After a few seconds of silence the only answer I had for him was, "I don't know." He looked at me with a puzzled look and with tears beginning to form in his eyes he asked, "When I die, do you think people will care?"

Without a pause I said, "More people than you think."

That brought a flood of tears from this young man and for the rest of the day we spoke about life. Not the physical being-ness of it, rather what kind of meaning it has for those who live it. You see, about the same time this young man began to grow angry and distance himself from others there was a car accident that took the life of a father and his very young son. The family was homeless, and nobody came forward to say they were related to this man or his family. For some reason this news bothered my young friend to the point where he believed humanity didn't have a caring soul in its collective body.

What he didn't know was that the family of the person who caused the accident came forward to pay for all the expenses of this man and his son's funeral, as well as took the homeless family in and promised to take care of them to the best of their ability. Upon hearing that news he once again looked at me with a puzzled look, and said, "Really? I hadn't heard that." I told him that was because the television news didn't pick up the story, but he could find it in print, if he wanted to.

I also decided to go a step further and tell him that had he opened up earlier, maybe his life, and his viewpoint of life in general, wouldn't have been so filled with hate and anger. He saw that now, and as far as I know he has tried, and still tries, to be as open as possible with his thoughts and feelings with the people he can trust.

Today's Psalm reminds us that keeping that which separates us from our relationships (my definition of sin) only makes things worse. Don't be afraid to let people in and break the silence. You just might find a way to peace and joy again.