Tuesday, September 4, 2012

When Everything Else Is Gone

The three-day weekend is just what we needed. I caught up on things around the house, got some rest, and just hung out with my wife for an extra day of uninterrupted-by-work time. Life was good. Life is still good. I woke up this morning ready for the day and ready for the week. Of course, the cynic which lives in the far reaches of my soul keeps waiting for the goodness to crumble.

I've lived life long enough to know that eventually all good things come to an end; a fact that today's reading from Psalm 146 reminds me of. Actually, the Psalm reminds me that my happiness really depends on who, or what, I trust to put my happiness in.

There was a time in my life when happiness meant 60-hour work weeks, good paychecks, late nights in clubs, and the knowledge that there were people around me who could supply me with things I needed to continue living in that happiness. In other words, I put my trust in false hope.

I say the hope was false because as I grew older, and wiser, I realized those things weren't making me happy, they were only masking a deep-seeded pain I refused to confront. I was unhappy with who I was and as long as I surrounded myself with people and things who made me feel happy I knew, even if for a few hours, I didn't have to deal with that pain.

Eventually, though, all the things which brought me false happiness disappeared. I lost jobs which paid me well, friends stopped calling, and one by one all the masks I used to hide my unhappiness fell away. I was left with only one way to find my true inner self - God.

I am ready for whatever comes, happy in the knowledge that I am now surrounded by God's love.

No comments:

Post a Comment